A Question Of Honour
by Ramica
Summary: Character deaths, including some turtles. Don's POV. Don questions if he has lived up to the ninja code of honour, as he reflects on past events. Inspired by a song called Question of Honour.


_**A Question of Honour**_

_**Disclaimer:** I have no ownership of any kind concerning mutated ninja teenage turtles._

_**Rating: T for violence and mild swearing**_

_**Warning: **There is character death, including turtle deaths ahead. Those who do not like reading such things, turn back now while you still can._

_**Author's Note:** This story was inspired by Sarah Brightman's song Question of Honour. I give deep and appreciative thanks to Reinbeauchaser who beta-read this story for me, and probably made it better for it. Especially as I know my grammar and punctuation can be atrocious. Ramica._

_XXX_

_**Honour – esteem. Respect - a recognition or distinction, a symbol or gesture of recognition or distinction. Privilege - a reputation, source of credit, a person of superior status; i.e. a judge, personal integrity.**_

_Honour is intangible; even the dictionary's convoluted definition leaves much to be desired. The Japanese have two separate words for honour. Meiyo - meaning credit, honour, or privilege. Then there is the word Uyamau, meaning respect, honour. Even that doesn't seem enough of a translation for all that honour is, or should be for that matter. _

_I closed the dictionary with a heavy sigh, and sat back in my chair, wondering, not for the first time and most likely not for the last either, if I had acted honourably? If I had made the right choices in my life._

_There was a time when honour meant a great deal to myself and my family. Honour went on to infinity and it was all my family lived for, it was the ninja way._

_Now I use ninja training to hide, to stay hidden, wondering what Leo or Raph would say if they saw me now? Would Splinter if he could see me now, though he has been gone many years. Would he bow his head in shame, then walk away, leaving me to wonder if I had disgraced him, his teachings and all that Yoshi had taught him, and through him, us? _

_A ninja lives for honour. Honour is everything and when one has disgraced the clan, as I feel I have done, then seppuku - ritual suicide, is the only way to gain it back. _

_That is why I ask it, that is why I wonder if I am doing what is honourable._

_To a ninja, it is honourable to right a wrongful death by killing one who has wronged you, and that is how this whole blood feud began. _

_Yoshi, our Master's Master, had gone to the home of his love, Tang Shen, only to find his rival, Oroku Nagi, beating Shen close to death. Seeing his beloved so abused caused Yoshi to fall into a fit of rage and kill Nagi. Yoshi knew he should have to commit seppuku for his crime, but Shen convinced him to flee with her. But even half a world away, Shen and Yoshi were not safe, for Oroku Nagi's younger brother sought revenge for the injustice done to him. He wanted the cowards to die. So, he followed them and killed them, leaving our Master injured and the sole survivor. Our Master sought his own revenge and called it honour, asking us, his sons, to do this honour for him. _

_Ninja are taught to value life, and it is hard to find balance when one sees the contrary predicament that is caused by such teachings. How can one value life, yet take it without a second thought? Ninja would probably view what I have done as being cowardly. Yet I have seen what this vicious blood feud has done and that the vicious circle cannot, will not, end unless one of us tries to break through, freeing all of us. It is clear the path of vengeance is not the right path._

_Still, is the path I walk truly dishonourable?_

_I don't know, it is a question of honour, it depends upon each person and their views of what honour is, what it means. So let me tell you a story of what brought me to this point, where I am questioning all that I was taught, where my mind seems in constant conflict with my choices and, maybe when I'm done, you can decide. _

_But whether you are right or wrong, of course, depends upon your perspective of honour._

XXX

New York skyscrapers stretched high up into the black night, leaving dark silhouettes with tiny burning lights that banished any mark of the moon or stars. A cool wind blew, flapping flags and scattering bits of litter below on the streets. Traffic inched along to the distant sounds of honking horns, with the occasional shout of irritation or music, the noise faintly drifting up numerous stories. It was nighttime, the time of ninja when the shadows were long, easy to find, and slipping around unaware was all too easy.

Leo had suggested a night-run for some exercise and we were all anxious to go up, because New York had suffered a deluge of rain the last few days and the sewers had been flooding. Going out at night, to become soaking wet and chilled, held little interest for any of us. The lack of rain and the cool wind, along with our newfound freedom, had us all going wild trying to out do one another, as we jumped from one rooftop to another. Sometimes we weren't so quiet, but we moved quickly, our enthusiasm finding expression.

"Yeeehaw" Mike yelled sounding as if riding a wild horse or a rodeo bull, as he leaped up high into the air, somersaulting and flipping with ease to the next roof.

"Ya call that a jump? I can out jump ya any day," Raph challenged, propelling himself off the roof and flipping with ease, landing on a heat vent pipe, turning, and then back flipping off it.

Leo rolled his eyes, "Show off," he mocked.

"I haven't seen you doing bettah, Leo," Raph commented casually as he swaggered over to my brother.

Leo smirked, "Oh yeah?"

Raph pushed into Leo's space going nose to nose with him, practically leaning over him. "**Yeah!**" he retorted.

Leo smiled, recognizing the challenge and the competitive streak that ran strong in the resident hot head. "Try and catch me then," he called over his shoulder, taking off.

Mike yipped, "Your going to get it now, Leo," he called after our brother.

I laughed, enjoying the playtime fun of these nightly games. It was up to us to try and catch him and out-do him. If we could do it, then whoever managed it got to lead in the next night's games. I felt the wind tugging at my bandanna tails as I chased off, wondering if combined tactics might be better. We often managed better under combined attacks, but then we had to take turns and, besides, I could sense that my brothers, like myself, were too full of energy and excitement. There was the thrill the challenge gave us and it wasn't time to try for a combined attack.

We hopped over rooftops all across the city, jumping alleys and roadways with daring feats of flips and acrobatics. I loved the sense of free fall, the slight drop, the thrill of it, and, of course, there was the adrenaline pumping hard through my veins. The game ended hours later when we all paused for a break, by then a little more worn out and far less exuberant.

I turned my head as I thought I heard something. I crept over to the rooftop edge and peered down below.

Five hoods were after a young lady, who cowered in the back alley. She was trembling but stood her ground. "Stay away from me or I'll yell," she warned them in a shaky voice.

Leo slipped up beside me, dropping a hand to my shoulders. His eyes narrowed as he glowered down below. Almost instantly, Mike and Raph were nearby, waiting for Leo's consent, though judging from Raph's low growl he wasn't going to wait long.

One of the hoods chuckled as if amused by her words, "Go ahead, purrrtty lady, ya think anyone will hear ya?"

She whimpered a bit as she saw them close in around her. One of the thugs gestured and they tightened the circle. At that instant, Leo sent us in.

We slid down the drainage spout, took the fire escape and other passages; yet all of us moved silently, quickly, and kept to the shadows. We hit the alley simultaneously and crouched there, waiting for the right time to strike. I began slipping ever so cautiously along the brick wall of the building. Even amongst the debris, I managed to move without so much as rustling a discarded paper.

As one thug swung out a hand to grab hold of the cowering woman, I reached out with my staff and punched the end of it into the guy's right side. He yelped, whirling to face me. The other hoods with him instantly realized that their game might be up and rounded on us in a typical aggressive manner.

"Can't we talk about this?" I heard Mike asking, saw him duck, and then dive in, his nunchuks hitting hard. But, Mike tempered his blows so that the guy would be bruised, but not necessarily broken, unless it was called for.

Raph didn't care about being nice; he was itching for a fight. He did a kick to the head, a blow that could kill with ease. But, he had held back just enough to give the thug he was working on a moment of vertigo. The guy swung wildly and then Raph tossed him into the dumpster where the fellow slumped.

My staff angled in for a corner shot, right between the legs. The guy reached for his 'jewels', his eyes growing large and round, and then he quickly let out a howl of pain as he dropped down. Something suddenly hit me from behind, taking me by surprise. I staggered, blinking my eyes, while my thoughts whirled in confusion. I knew the only one behind me was the girl, and yet there was no denying she had done something to me. Being attacked by those we saved was nothing new; we were well use to how we were treated by the general public at large.

Still, it seemed more than peculiar for her to attack me out right, instead of slipping off while I was occupied.

Leo was finishing off his two thugs and he turned to see my distress. "**DON!"** he yelled. He tore towards me, his katana raised, just as Mike grew bored of playing with his creep and knocked him out.

Raph's head shot upward and he scrambled towards Mike, moments before a rain of arrows from above were released. "Damn Foot" Raph hissed dodging arrows, "Mikey look out!"

Mike instinctively jumped back, flipping out of the way, although one arrow did pierce his leg. Mike winced and faltered ever so slightly.

Leo reached me and, in a very uncharacteristic fashion, slammed the woman into the wall, causing her to slump, as his swords worked to block the arrows coming our way. "Don, are you all right?" He demanded over his shoulder.

"Yeah but..." I began to protest.

"This is too coincidental and she attacked you first" Leo snarled, "Something about her, she is a good actress, I'll grant her that."

"We are pinned down for the moment, aren't we Leo?" I asked as I observed our present situation.

"It seems that way," he admitted.

I meditated, trying to clear my mind to prepare for whatever was going to happen next, because we knew it wasn't over. I looked at Raph and Mike on the other side of the alley. "Why don't they come down here?" Raph wondered.

In reply to his answer, a barrage of shuriken flew towards us from the front of the alley. As I began to get my bearings back, with my ninja training helping me to feel almost normal - though I knew it wasn't so, I reached into my belt, wondering if something in one of my many pouches might prove to be our salvation. Tear bombs, smoke bombs, small tools, some rope, potions and powders; the usual ninja tricks, and yet I couldn't think of one way to get out of our present situation.

The attack halted, but we sensed the enemies' presence and stood our ground, waiting for whatever was going to come. Raph tentatively stretched out a foot, as if willing to make a move, and an arrow landed just barely between his toes. He growled; Raph wasn't very patient at the best of times.

Karai, Shredder's daughter, then stepped into the alleyShe had her own code of ethics, for she had taken over for her father, when she realized the Foot were going astray, and come to take her place as the leader of the ClanThey needed strong powerful leadership and, of course, she wanted to avenge her father's death, as we had avenged Yoshi's death.

(Do you see what I mean by this vicious circle? Do you now understand why I took the path I now walk? I'm sorry, I know I digress)

"Tur-tles," she smiled in the way a cat might when it has done something that pleases it, "I see my trap has caught the very prize I was fishing for."

"I thought I sensed something wrong with this set-up," Leo announced, his eyes locked on hers, as he spun a katana in his hands.

"It is, how they say, too little too late Leo- Nardo," Karai declared, "Too late for you and your family that is," she concluded.

"It is never too late, Karai" Leo corrected. He turned and looked me in the eyes, holding my gaze.

I gave a subtle nod, knowing what he asked for, even without him speaking words. Words don't say enough, they cannot convey everything that one feels, or thinks, but there are other forms of communication. The bonds that formed between my brothers and I, bonds forged in life and death struggles, in battles, in the art of ninjitsu itself, had led us to communicate without the need for words. I knew what my brother wanted of me and I didn't want to do it, yet I didn't have a choice.

Leo hardened his look. "Do it!" he said softly, but never loosing the edge of commanding that he used when being ' _the leader'_ of us. Then without any other word, he strode towards Karai purposely.

Karai waited for him to close the distance between them, a matter of a few feet. She raised her own sword, her eyes glinted; she was ready for him. In seconds, their swords were locked and there was the sound of metal ringing out, steel against steel. I knew the dance between them had only begun. They were both skilled in kenpo, or the art of the sword. They could be locked in combat for some time and any wrong move could mean death to either.

While the two fought, searching for an opening to take advantage and score first blood, I cautiously moved towards Raph and Mike, "Come on to the rooftops, while they are occupied."

"No way; I'm going get me some of that," Raph snarled, gesturing towards Karai.

"Leo wants us to try and get away. If we can make the roof, we can clear out the Foot that might try to intercede on Karai's behalf," I pointed out.

Raph nodded. "Fine, then you and Mike can keep watch and I'll come kick Karai's butt," he stated.

"Sure, whatever, Raph," Mike answered as he moved to the fire escape.

We knew the Foot were up above, ready to attack us, but we hoped they wouldn't do much while we made our way to the roof. That they would attack to keep us from reaching our destination was a given. But, they would be limited in how much they could do without possibly distracting or injuring Karai, who was still locked in mortal combat below us.

Sure enough, the Foot did their best to press us back. I got an arrow in my shoulder, Mike got some sort of powder in his eyes as he neared the top, and Raph ended up with a couple of shuriken in him.

Mike stumbled onto the roof; his eyes squeezed shut. I moved over to protect him from the soldiers who were moving in, at least until he could see a bit better. I hoped his vision would clear quickly with the aid of tears, for I didn't have time to stop and rinse the powder from his eyes. Raph was in his usual anger driven fighting technique, slamming the Foot down left and right with ease. In little time, the two of us managed to clear the rooftop of our enemies.

"I'll check perimeter. You stay with Mike," Raph called to me, as he took off.

Damn him! He was always so impulsive and taking off so quickly. He didn't know what trouble he'd get into, what sort of situations he might face, or how many enemies might be waiting. He didn't know any of that and, in typical Raphael fashion, he didn't care. Yet logically, I knew someone had to scan the area and we couldn't leave Mike alone.

Mike blinked tear-filled eyes, "I think I'll be all right Donny, but man, this stings. It really hurts."

I found the water bottle hooked to his belt and tilted his head up, "Let's get them cleaned out, Mike." I gave him my best 'reassuring everything is going be okay' tone, as I poured the liquid into his eyes. "There, that ought to take care of anything that's left." I murmured. I could still hear the sound of metal on metal below and I couldn't resist going to check, by peering down over the edge. In the darkness of the night, it was hard to see, but our eyes were used to working in utter blackness. It seemed Karai wasn't giving Leo a chance to escape, if he turned, she would run him through.

"Don, someone's coming, I think," Mike muttered, "I sense someone heading this way, and I thought I saw a blurry movement; course right now, almost everything is a blur."

I turned to see Raph, who was sporting a few more injuries than what he had before, "We're clear at the moment, but we got to get out fast, reinforcements are coming." He huffed, "So let's get Leo and get out of here."

I nodded, wanting to reach Leo myself. I turned in time to see him jump for the fire escape, and Karai slice at his right leg, tearing into muscles. She also tossed a throwing dagger into the upper left leg. Leo gripped the ladder and dropped unexpectedly.

"The knife is poison tipped, Leo-Nardo, you will not live much longer," she informed him as pleasantly as if discussing the time of day.

Leo tried to stand and raise his swords, but he was weakening.

"Let's go, Don" Raph urged and all ready moving.

I grabbed my hotheaded brother, sensing the Foot closing in fast, "No we have to get out of here."

"We aren't leavin' Leo," Raph denied shaking his head.

"We have to, or will all be caught." I insisted. Leo wanted us free and I was going see to it that's the way it would be. "We are hurt, we can't handle much more fighting."

Suddenly we heard a slight choking gasping sound from below, I turned and saw Leo slump, there was something wrong about his head and I knew what it had to be. Karai must have come close enough to behead Leo while the poison affected his system.

Leo was dead.

My subconscious told me, even while a part of me rejected it, that it wanted to verify he was gone. There was no chance, though, and I knew there wasn't time to think. Karai was looking up to us and moving for the fire escape.

"Now, come on, now! The Foot will be here any moment!" I demanded.

"Bring them on I'll get them for this," Raph challenged.

"No, Raph, later - not now!" I fumed. I knew Leo's death meant a big victory for our enemies and we were all ready hurt and injured. We couldn't stay or we'd all die and then Leo's sacrifice would be meaningless. We would get our revenge. I wanted Karai and all the Foot to pay, but I wanted it to be on my terms not theirs.

I'm not really sure how we managed to escape and get back to the safety of our home. By then the shock of Leo's death was starting to sink in. Even as I worked on patching us up, I could no longer deny that our brother was gone. I hated leaving him behind for the Foot to use as their trophy in some fashion or another, they undoubtedly would do just that. The thought sickened me, that he would be in some way displayed, when his body ought to be given honour and respect for all that he had done.

Raph paced the lair like a caged animal, growling and snarling and screaming vendettas, "We shouldn't have left him Don!"

"What, you wanted to stay and get killed, Raph?"

"It would have brought us more honour, than turning with our tails between our legs an' hiding," Raph countered, "This isn't the ninja way, Don; course you've never been ninja, have you," he accused.

"What good is staying there to die, Raph? We can get our revenge, we will get Karai, but when **they** least expect it," I countered, not even caring to respond to his comment about my lack of ninja skills. I had never cared much for battle, this is true. But I had always considered myself ninja nonetheless, and Splinter had assured me that ninja often move past their warrior lives, choosing a peaceful path, only coming out of retirement to aid those they may find worthy.

"Don, this is about honour!" Raph reminded me.

"Exactly. It isn't a question of who is wrong or right here, it is simply a question of honour" I agreed.

Mike cut in. "STOP IT!" he yelled, "Both of you just cut it out. We lost Splinter, and now we've lost Leo and I don't think I can do this anymore." Mike's chest rose and fell quickly, his eyes were red and sore, but there was panic and fear there, as well. He shook uncertainly and choked back a sob, "Just...don't...it's ...enough." he begged through his tears. Klunk, Mike's kitten, came into the infirmary and rubbed against Mike's leg, mewing pitifully and looking up at his owner uncertainly.

Raph seemed to soften as he looked at Mike, the one we always treated as the baby brother, although we had no idea of who was older or younger. Raph walked over and pulled Mike into his arms, hugging him. I joined in the group-hug and we all cried, letting loose the pain, the hurt, the anguish we each felt.

I finally raised my head and sniffed, "Come on, we can all use a rest." I suggested weakly, "Raph, see that Mike gets settled all right."

Raph nodded and led Mike from the room, Klunk following after them.

I sighed, miserably, staring at my empty bed, and headed for my computer. I didn't always take my own advice and I knew this was one time when I couldn't sleep.

A while later I woke up to the sound of the phone ringing. I blinked my eyes blearily and answered it. "Hullo" I croaked.

"Donny, that you? It's April, we got a phone call from Raph, saying that he needed Casey's help to hunt down Karai. He wouldn't explain why, but Casey went to meet him." April's anxious worried tone was clear.

Aw, shit, aw hell, and damn it all too! Why did Raph go and do that? He knows April is pregnant with Casey's child and here he is causing trouble? Is this vendetta the only thing that matters to him? I glanced at the clock and saw it was only two in the morning.

"We'll find Raph and Casey both" I assured April and hurried to wake Mike up, hoping that the Foot would not end up killing another member of our family.

For Raph, this was a clear-cut case of revenge. Karai had killed Leo and he would not rest until he made her pay. It was a matter of the ninja code and the fact that Karai had wronged us, he intended to make it right. He couldn't wait or bide his time. I knew all of **that,** yet in my own pain and grief I had felt that maybe Raph would be willing to wait. I should have known better. If he or Casey got hurt, it would be my fault. Being leader wasn't all it was cracked up to be.

I hurried to rouse Mike, while silently berating myself for falling asleep and not hearing Raph slip out of the lair. I conveniently forgot all the times Raph had snuck into or out of the lair in the middle of the night with no one the wiser. Mike finally opened his eyes and yawned.

"What's goin' on, bro?" he muttered.

"Raph left, he met up with Casey and now both of them are after the Foot." I informed him.

Mike jerked instantly awake and began grabbing his gear while complaining about how stupid Raph was. He was ready to go very quickly, though he admitted to me that his vision was still a little fuzzy.

Even with Mike's fairly quick response, I knew we had to be at least thirty minutes to a whole hour behind Raph and Casey. I had no idea if I could prevent the inevitable, for in Raph's anger and infinite desire for revenge, he was bound to get himself in far too deep that not even Casey would insure his survival. This was not any form of premonition; rather it was just knowing Raph for who he was.

Mike and I followed the trail. It was easy to follow considering the fallen Foot Soldiers we came across and other signs of battle. In a back alley we found Casey, killed by a nunchuk blow to the head.

Mike bowed his head. "Aw, Casey," he whispered and sniff. I saw him tremble and he looked towards me as if to say, 'What now?'

"We have to find Raph quickly," I replied to his silent question.

Pushing off to the rooftops once more, we followed the carnage of blood spills, broken weapons, and those who had fallen. From the amount of Foot soldiers lying about, I knew that they were celebrating, and also looking for us to finish the task, probably feeling that with one of us down, the others would soon topple, much as dominoes will fall by pushing over just one. Mike stayed silent as we moved. I guess he couldn't find much to joke about and I had to agree this wasn't a laughing matter, but I think I would have welcomed one of his quips right about then.

We had traveled to the East side and there, on a rooftop, we saw Karai and Raph. Raph's anger had diminished and he was fighting now for his life. He had forgotten one of Splinter's most valuable lessons, that together we were stronger, as a team we could vanquish. In his need to get revenge, he forgot all else except how to regain honour. The ninja code insisted that Karai die. It was honour, all about honour, no more or less. Black could have been white, night could have been day and honour would **still** be honour.

I could tell Raph was tired; he was badly injured and pushing on, doing his best. I glanced at Mike.

"Go on, Don, help him. I'm right behind you," Mike urged. He knew he had to really gauge his jumps, for the moment, due to the problem with his eyes, and so he knew it was better for me to go on ahead.

I made the last couple of jumps, but I had hardly landed on the rooftop where they were, when Karai's sword made a killing blow. Raph seemed to go limp instantly with a strike to his throat, but he tossed one sai. Karai, sure of her win, didn't try to defend against the weapon. Perhaps she didn't see it, for she was probably tired as well. Whatever the case was, the sai found its mark as it plunged into her stomach; it may well have even hit vital organs, too.

Karai gasped, her hands closing around the hilt of the sai, then she stumbled and fell forward to the ground, the sai ramming deeper into the soft tissue, as a pool of blood flowed from her fallen body.

"**NOOOOOO!"** I yelled to the heavens and whatever unmerciful god may be staring down on us. I ran to my brother and searched for a pulse, for some sign he was alive, while tears streamed from my eyes.

I felt a hand drop to my shoulder. I whirled, ready to take out whoever had dared interfered with me, but it was only Mike.

"Don, we can't stay here." Mike said, his tone almost whining. There was a glazed look in his eyes, but even in his shock, he was making sense.

I was always very logical, and for once, I hated that. I didn't want to think logically or be reasonable. More than half of my family had been destroyed this one night. Yet I heard a voice whisper _' Care for the family'_. Perhaps it was just the memory of Leo and what he would have done, but it was there. "Right Mike. Leave Raph here." I hated saying those words, but I knew taking his body would slow us down, and it didn't really matter who found it, because I knew we couldn't stay in the city for much longer.

We stopped at April's and found her drinking tea at her table.

"Don!" she gasped as she hugged me.

"We can't stay, April. It is too dangerous. Mike and I are leaving New York and we won't be in touch with you, because the Foot may track us through you. As long as they feel that you may eventually lead them to where we may be, hopefully they will leave you alone." I explained quickly.

"Don" she grabbed me roughly in her hands "What about Casey?"

I gulped as I looked at her. What could I tell her, how could I say it? I knew I would break her heart and I loved her, in my own way, in my own fashion, but then I knew I had to tell her something. "I'm sorry, April" I shook my head, "He...didn't make it," I managed to choke out.

April let me go, backing up, shaking her head in denial "No, Don, he...he can't be..."

"I'm sorry, April" I echoed not knowing what else to say, and knowing I could stay no longer, I headed out the way I came, trying to shut my ears to the heartbreaking sobs I heard coming from her apartment.

XXX

_Mike and I stole a van that night, loaded up a few necessities - food, medical supplies, weapons - and took off out of the city, and headed for parts unknown. We didn't talk much, just drove and got as much distance as possible between New York and ourselves._

_It maybe wasn't the best plan, but I couldn't stay there and with every thing else, I just felt it was wiser to leave._

_The Foot can't get their revenge on us and maybe in time they will forget the blood feud between our two clans, allowing us to live and let live._

_Mike and I don't care to go back, either. In the end, we found a small town in the country not far from a national park, so there is plenty of room for us to roam free. Mike's eyesight never returned to what it was, but he is ninja enough that his other senses compensated for what he lost in vision. We help one another since we are the only family the other has. I made sure that Mike didn't mind not going back for revenge. Then again, Mike was never much for fighting anyways, and as he puts it, we got Karai and they got Raph. We are even._

_I know a true ninja would not see it that way. I am bothered by nightmares, though, and the feeling that I have not acted honourably._

_So what do you believe? Was I honourable? Have I disgraced my clan, my training? Have I done what was right? Or, have I condemned my brother and me to a lifetime of being nothing more than fallen ninja? Will the Foot see it as we do and call a truce, or will they come hunting for us, knowing they only have a few more deaths to finish the task of destroying our clan? _

_As I said before, it all depends on what honour means to you._

_I want to believe I'm not a coward. I want to believe I have acted as a ninja should and yet, there is a part of me that calls for revenge and I swear I hear Raph telling me, for honour's sake, to avenge his death. It whispers, often shouts so loudly that it keeps me from doing what I have always enjoyed until now, and it haunts me night and day._

_I heave a sigh and push myself up from the chair. Perhaps the only way to gain honour is through seppuku. I walk almost woodenly towards the katana and take the sword down from where it hangs. The cold metal feels good in my hands. I tighten my grip around the blade and feel it bite into my hand and feel the blood, see the red staining the metal, and smile_

_Yes! This is the path to honour!_

_Then, a thought comes unbidden to my mind. "W_hat about Mike?"

_I toss the sword across the room, shaking uncontrollably, as my legs seem to turn to jelly under me. I have conquered it again, but I know I have not defeated it, for the ninja way of honour tells me to set everything right. There must be blood, my enemies' or mine. Until I can resolve this dilemma, it may remain so._

_For no matter where I turn to or what I do, I can not escape the fact that this is a question of honour, not of right or wrong, but what is honourable. _

**The End**


End file.
